The pandemic has made all of us rethink our lives, how short life is, and how precious is our remaining time. I have been thinking about this topic - but from the flipside. The inevitable exit, the end of life, is a subject we all avoid as if it is a forbidden topic. No doubt, death is a dreary topic, but talk we must, as there is no escaping it. After all, it is our journey’s end, final destination on earth.
Death is the only certain thing in life. ("Every mortal will taste death, but only some will taste life” - Rumi) But it is also the greatest unknown. We don’t know the time, place, and cause of our death.
As I grow older, I see myself attending more and more funerals and hearing more and more about parents of friends and relatives passing through the natural aging process. As we all know, so many have passed away during the pandemic.
Recently, there have been five deaths among my family and friends. These five people could not be more different in terms of age, profession, family situation, and time/place/cause of death. As I attended the funerals and burials of two of them, and watched the others online, I began wondering about their buried bodies and started to realize that all their skills, experiences, and memories were buried as well. What would/should happen to their Facebook or/and LinkedIn profile? Did they write something about their lives and personal experiences that might be useful for later generations?
If you don’t believe in the hereafter, then that’s it: full stop, the story is over. But if you do, it raises several questions/concerns. What comes after this life?
I believe that we will be judged for our deeds/actions during our time on earth. Depending on the weighing of these deeds, we will be rewarded or punished. Without believing this, I cannot fathom the way the world works: injustice, exploitation, oppression, greed, misery, calamities, extreme poverty, opulence, inborn disabilities etc.
Recently, I talked to a friend who does not believe in God because of all the misery he sees in the world. My argument for him was that for me, this is precisely the reason to believe in God. If this world is the end of it all, then there is no hope for the oppressed. There has to be a reckoning!
In the modern world, reminding oneself of our eventual end is considered fatalistic. Not good for human progress on earth. But a saying of prophet Mohammed (PBUH) helps put things in perspective: Even if the end of time is upon you and you have a seedling in your hand, plant it!. Actually reflecting on our final demise makes us more cognizant of the value of our time on earth.
Thinking about death and believing in the hereafter keeps me balanced, makes me optimistic, and helps me focus on the things that matter the most. Highs are really not that high and lows are really not that low. It helps me strive to do good and avoid/shun evil. In general, just trying to be a good human being, even with all the fits and starts in my case:-)
Steve Jobs had famously said that he did not want to be the richest man in the cemetery. In the same vein, I have often meditated on lying in a casket and becoming alive for a moment. What would my regrets be?
I have a list of Q&A for my deathbed. I will share these questions here, and you can fill in your answers.
• What would you consider as your greatest accomplishment?
• What are your greatest memories?
• What are your greatest regrets?
• Would you like to seek forgiveness from anybody for anything?
• What would be the wisdom you chose to share from your life?
• What would you consider as your legacy?
• What would you do if you had more time on this planet?
Wouldn’t it be neat to reflect on and answer these questions! Would these answers help us lead better, more contented lives?
